How to Find Love this Summer

June 21, 2013

I have two events coming up that are not to be missed! So, if you’re in the NYC area come out and join us.

Get Ready for Love: A Single Ladies’ Dating Strategy
Saturday, June 29th from 10AM-2PM

I think I sent the wrong link to this event last week, but there’s still time to register. If you’ve been saying you need to “work on yourself” before you meet the right man or if you’re just plain old confused about dating and not sure what to expect, this event is just for you. I’m going to be sharing some really great tools, tips and strategies to help you see some action in your love life, so you can finally meet the man who’s right for you. Click here to register.

Summer Lovin’ Party- Tuesday, July 16th

I’ve partnered with Cheek’d for this amazing summer party that you don’t want to miss. And the best part? There’s going to be men there! Come get some free dating advice from yours truly, and put your sexy flirty side to work. Click here to sign up!

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How to Find Love This Summer

There was a really great article posted on Yahoo this week about an overweight woman who is dating a normal sized, really hot guy. She talks about all the comments she’s received from people like “how nice of him to be with her” or “is he blind?”. Unfortunately, these comments are often par for the course when a woman dates a man who is deemed better looking, more sophisticated, or in any way above her station in life. Some folks are real particular about wanting you to stay in your dating lane so that you don’t challenge the status quo or what they believe they can have or deserve in a mate.

I have a very interesting connection to this topic. In my Date in Your Discomfort Zone article last week, I talked about my own personal challenges with weight and my willingness to meet men offline these days. But that’s only part of the story. For as long as I can remember, I’ve managed to either date or have some kind of relationship with all of my crushes. And I’m not talking about some average joe, I’m talking about the men who most women found gregarious, interesting and attractive. Somehow, they made their way into my space or I made my way into theirs and we had a connection. What was powerful for me about these experiences is that I got to see some really conventionally attractive men up close and personal, and it taught me not to be intimidated by anyone’s looks. And it showed me that people who seem to have it all together have problems just like everyone else. Having this information makes dating so much easier and a lot less intimidating.

What the Yahoo author says about how she met her man and the nature of their relationship goes against what women are told it takes to date and fall in love: love yourself first, make sure you feel perfect on the inside and love everything about your life then he’ll show up. As though you can’t be in the process of getting your emotional life on track while dating or that the man in your life can’t be a loving, positive support for you in that process? The one caution I would give to any woman who is dating but struggles with loving and accepting herself, is the potential to fall into the trap of thinking that she’s only worth something because her man says so. And if he leaves, will he take her self-esteem with him?

Couples meet and fall in love under all kinds of conditions and circumstances, and its a lie to think that you need to be in some perfect place to meet the right man. But dating, getting ready for love, and the work that I do with my clients is ultimately about self-discovery and a way to have the best, most productive and happy relationship possible. What you discover is that love is an inside job.

But, you want to know the fastest path to love this summer? Just start dating. A lot. Until you meet the right one.

What’s the next move in your dating life going to be? Leave a comment and share.

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