August 9, 2013
I used to be obsessed with knowing what the future held for me in the love department.
Several years ago, I went on an amazing 24-hour date with a man who I didn’t hear from again until almost a year later. I was pretty distraught when I didn’t hear from him, and I was making myself crazy trying to figure out what went wrong. One afternoon, I was strolling in the West Village with a friend and she suggested I go see a psychic. I had never been to a psychic before, but I didn’t think I had anything to lose. The psychic gave me a little bit of Intel about the situation I was in, and I saw her a few more times which led me down an awful rabbit hole of thinking she could do something for my love life that I couldn’t do for myself.
If you are frustrated with being single, it’s possible that you’re desperate for somebody else to give you the answer as to why your man hasn’t showed up yet, instead of being willing to live in the discomfort of not having what you want just yet. To live and sit with feeling jealous of friends who have what you want, your insecurities, and the implications you’ve created in your own mind about what it means and how it reflects on you to not have the guy yet is a powerful but often difficult choice to make. But the best thing I can do to help you figure out what’s not working in your love life, is to hand you a flashlight and a shovel so you can look within yourself and start digging.
There is no magical prayer, affirmation, outfit, perfect profile, or right words to say to make love happen any faster for you than it’s already happening. You get one life, once chance to make it good and all that it can be. Do you want to spend it obsessing over when a man is going to show up?
I hope you’ll let yourself off the hook and release any notions about needing to follow one right path to get this love thing right. My role as a dating and love coach is to be a guidepost for you and a midwife of sorts, to help you through the process of releasing old hurts from past relationships and any mistakes you feel like you’ve made with men, dating, and love so you can give birth to what you truly desire.
Love and relationships are beautiful, but for the love of God, don’t think you have to do it like somebody else. Your life and love doesn’t have to look like anyone else’s, this is your love story.
I don’t know if I believe that everything happens for a reason, but I do know that whatever is happening in your life is happening now, and it can teach you something if you let it. So if you’re single, frustrated and can’t take one more lonely night on the couch, there is something to be learned in that moment.
Are you obsessed with when you’ll meet Mr. Right? Leave a comment and lets talk about it.