May 30, 2014
Last night I co-facilitated a panel discussion called Dream Man, Dream Job, and one of the questions I was asked was how do you know when you’re ready for love?
After the event, I spent some time thinking about what gets triggered in someone that lets them know they are ready for love? But I don’t think there’s a simple answer. It’s not simple because there are lot of people who get married and are happy, who aren’t ready for love in the sense that maybe they don’t have all of their finances together, they have a chronic disease, they’re dealing with a child custody issue with their ex or maybe they just got laid off. In our world of “all circumstance must be perfect to create a love relationship”, nobody in any of these situations are technically ready for love, yet people in these kinds of circumstances make love happen everyday.
Now the truth is there’s everybody else and then there’s YOU. And you’re likely a woman who is single and has either struggled with love and dating in the past or you really want to be married or in a long-term relationship, and haven’t met the right man yet. You spend a good amount of time on personal and spiritual development, and you read my weekly newsletter, so not only do you want to have an amazing partner, you also want to be in a really good place inside yourself and in your own life, so that you can receive the best that life has to offer.
So here’s what I’ll say to you:
I don’t think there’s a perfect place you have to be in to make love happen, but while you’re single and are of the mind to prepare yourself, why not do so the best you can? Why not work on your shit and be the best partner you can be, so that you’ll have less headaches down the line? And not only that, tending to old wounds and filling yourself up with love and joy separate and apart from a man, will only enhance the quality of your life and make you a better person and partner.
A more concrete answer for how to know when you’re ready for love is simple: saying you’re ready and making the decision is the first order of business. That means getting really honest with yourself about what you truly want. Stop lying to yourself and telling other people that marriage doesn’t matter to you when you know that’s precisely what you want. Be clear about what you want so that life can conspire with you to bring it to you. Don’t truncate your dreams and desires for love, marriage or life long partnership out of fear.
Make a bold declaration about the love and partnership you want to create in your life and stand by it, no matter what your current circumstances look like. That’s how you’ll know when you’re ready for love.
Do you believe you’re ready for love? If not, what do you think it will take for you to be ready? Leave a comment and share your thoughts.